I suddenly think: I wish I had been a miser up till now! So clearly I don’t think I have been and that for me that was not my first choice as to how to live my life so why does it pop up as that symbolic thought? It is about retaining my resources for my own use.
It is a message to self that I have not been sufficiently self-protective. It is my boundary marker for myself.
What triggered it? The client for whom I worked till 8.00 pm on a Friday night questioning the last invoice triggered it. The fact that I was so interested in solving their problem, I let myself down perhaps. That going the extra mile may not be recognised once my use has ended.
I do become interested in the problem to be solved. We all recognise that many clients can not appreciate a job really well done. I have to accept that I have to define my value. This case was interesting. I learnt a lot. I don’t regret my engagement but I will acknowledge my own reminder to self.